Fantasy Football Part 1

Hey everyone! A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away (yet still kinda close), Matticus and I did a story called Revis and Matticus Save the Kingdom. We both wrote on each part and then rotated on whose blog the next part would be published on. Well, we’re doing a new one. This is just the first part of our new blog hopping story. The next part will be published over at The Matticus Kingdom

We hope you’ll enjoy it.

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The ball felt good leaving his hand. He watched as it flew through the air in a nice, tight spiral. Accuracy was the only question now. It was aimed correctly, but did he judge the distance correctly?

His receiver’s hands wrapped around the ball mid-flight. It was placed perfectly. Two feet touched down, in bounds, as the receiver fell out of the back of the endzone. He pumped his fist. Touchdown!

The whistle blew and it was followed quickly by his coach saying, “Good job, Marapleksian.” After a pause, the coach turned to the sideline and hollered, “Backups, it’s your turn.”

He ran off the field, shaking his head at his coach’s insistence on using his whole name. Everybody else just called him Plex. Even his traditionalist parents had relented and began calling him the shortened middle part of his name. They didn’t like it, but hearing his friends call him that for 123 years finally wore them down.  Continue reading

Watching What I Wear

I work in a warehouse, so my attire isn’t very important to them. As long a there is no cussing, or anything sexually explicit, on my shirts, I can wear anything that I want. That usually means that I’ll wear all of my oldest shirts to work because I’ll be less likely to care if they get messed up.

With the exception of my dress clothes, 90% of my wardrobe consists of sports shirts. The rest is band shirts, or dirty minded phrases and pictures. So, a lot of the time, I’ll be wearing a football shirt: either Ohio State or Carolina Panthers. At work, however, it’s always Ohio State.

The only reason for this is that almost all of my Ohio State shirts are older than my Panthers shirts. Since my Ohio State shirts are all kind of worn out, and my Panthers shirts aren’t, I’ll wear them. That means, on the weekends, I’ll wear the shirts that I don’t want to wear to work. So, I end up wearing Panthers stuph a lot on the weekends.

However, I’ve begun to realize that I can’t wear Panthers stuph on certain days on the weekend. Specifically, I can’t wear Panthers stuph on the days that Mrs. Revis and I go grocery shopping.

We almost always go to the same grocery store. There’s a guy that works at the grocery store who is special. Whenever he sees me walk in with my Panthers stuph on, no matter what he’s doing, he’ll walk up and talk to me about my shirt….. or my hat, or Cam Newton.

I’m nice to him and talk for a few moments, but then I walk away to start my shopping….. He follows me and keeps talking.

Now, if it was just me, I wouldn’t mind. I’d let him talk all shopping trip long and pretend to pay attention. But, I’m with my family. I don’t get a lot of time with them and, no offense to this guy, I don’t want to spend it talking to him.

We don’t want to change stores just to avoid this guy, so now we have a new weekend routine. Before I get dressed, I ask if we’re going to the store. If the answer is ‘no’, I’ll put on some of my Panthers stuph. If the answer is ‘yes’, I put on anything that doesn’t say Panthers on it.

Living in the Basketball State

I’ve lived in Kentucky for most of my life, so I know how obsessed most of the people in this state are with basketball. The other night, however, that obsession hit a new low (in my eyes, anyways). My supervisor called us all together for a meeting. Normally, these meetings are about changes in our processing procedures. This one was not. This meeting was to tell us that next Monday we’d be working earlier than usual. I work 2-11 every day. Monday we’re working from 12-9. The reason we’re working 12-9? We’re working 12-9 so that everybody can go home and watch the NCAA Championship basketball game.

I’m all for getting out of work before 11, but this is just ridiculous. If this is how crazy the people of Kentucky are about basketball, why has no NBA owner brought a team in? You’d think that they’d be able to make some money from these people. Plus, they can market the NBA team to the college fans by calling the team the “Kentucky WildCards”, that way you get both UK and Louisville fans. I  know some U of L fans might be upset that UK seems to go first in the name, but they can get over it, because that’s the only way to combine the names so that it makes sense. I think it would work. Now, I just need to get ahold of an NBA owner so I can get a cut of the action if they ever do this.