Being Strong

For as long as I can remember, dealing with my own problems, the things that happen to me, has been fairly easy. It’s not until I see the people I care about having to struggle that I begin to find it hard. This is especially true when the problem that they have is something that I can’t help them with. Nothing hurts me more than seeing a loved one dealing with something and knowing that there’s absolutely nothing I can do.

In my heart, I feel like I should be the one to suffer the slings and arrows for them, but in my mind, I know that they have to find the strength to get through their trials by themselves. I can’t be strong for them…

But, I will be there to be strong with them.

The One Little Thing

So far, my new job seems to be going pretty well. The work seems fairly easy. The people there seem cool so far. If anything, I’d say I only have one little thing that bothers me about the job right now.

After getting home the other day, my wife asked me to run to the store up the street to get something that we didn’t have for what she was making for dinner. The store is only a couple thousand yards (or so) away from my house, so I’ll always walk up there (unless it’s raining really hard). I walk there, get what I need to get, and start walking home. About halfway back, one of my neighbors was outside and stopped me to ask me why I shopped at that store. That may seem weird to some of you, but there was a reason that she did so.

I work for a large grocery chain. I don’t actually work in one of their stores, however. I work in one of their warehouses. Unfortunately, the one little the thing that bothers me is that one of the requirements of my job is that I have to wear a polo shirt with the company logo on the chest. So, when my neighbor stopped me, her question was, “Why are you shopping at that grocery store when you work for a different one?”

Instead of trying to explain to her that I can’t buy things from my job site (Apparently it would cause some kind of malfunction in the inventory tracking), I just made a comment about how this store was closer to my house, which was also true. I wasn’t about to get in my car and drive a few miles to buy two items from the closest store of my grocery chain when I could walk up the street and do it a hell of a lot quicker.

If this was the only incident, I wouldn’t mind the dress code thing, but I’ve stopped into one of my stores a number of times on my way home from work and have been on the receiving end of some very strange looks from the employees there. I think most of them are trying to figure out who the hell I am, because I obviously work for the company. To avoid the hassle of the conversations that would come of their questioning, I go through the self check out and get the hell out of there as quickly as I can.

It hasn’t happened yet, but I know it’s only a matter of time before I’m in a store on my way home from work and a customer is going to see the logo on my shirt and assume I work there. While I know there are some decent people out there, I’ve also worked retail enough to know that there’s a really good chance that they’ll get pissed when I tell them that while I work for the company, I don’t actually for that store.

Getting into the Groove

Things are going well for me in my new job so far. It’s still an adjustment for me, however. Especially when the hours aren’t exactly the greatest. I’m still working on trying to get into a rhythm with these new hours. Mostly, I’m trying to work as much family time into my days as I can. No matter what, I want to squeeze every second I can into my time with my girls.

One of the things that has suffered so far in this transition is my available writing time… I haven’t had any.

Sure, that will probably change once Baby E goes back to school after her winter break is up. I’ll have some time to write in between dropping her off at school and having to go to work. Of course, that’s also prime video game and/or TV watching time. So, who knows? Maybe I’ll alternate days… or something. I guess it’ll depend on how I’m feeling each day.

It’ll probably be a little while before I get into a groove in my new schedule.

My Newest First Day

A couple months ago, I was informed by my employer that the contract we had with the company we did work for was being given to someone else. That meant that at the end of the year, I’d be out of a job because that’s the only contract my employer had. After working there for almost 8 years, it was a kick in the gut. It wasn’t something I was expecting. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do next.

They were going to give me a severance package that would have given me around 2 months worth of pay if I stuck it out with them until the end. Since most of the jobs available, for someone with my qualifications anyway, were of the seasonal variety, I was going to ride it out, collect the severance pay, and go from there. So, I put the thoughts of a new job on the back burner and went about my business as usual.

Then, right before Thanksgiving, a guy I used to work with posted about a job opening working for him. I would’ve ignored it, as part of my “waiting for the end” plan, but it was a decent jump in pay. A jump that I wasn’t sure I’d be able to get if I waited. So, I applied for it, I had my interview on Black Friday, and was eventually offered the job. After waiting for my background check and drug test to come back, I had my orientation this afternoon.

The upside to this job, obviously, is the increase in pay. The downside is my schedule. I’m not really working the hours I want right now. I was told that, down the road, I’d be able to move to the hours I want when a position becomes available though, so I’m willing to go along with it for now. It also means that I’m back to working on weekends, something that I haven’t had to do since I worked for Walmart.

Hopefully, this job is worth the horrible hours. Hopefully, it’s a good job. Hopefully, this all works out.

Well Intentioned Words

A few days ago I ran into a guy I used to work with way back in my Walmart days. Of course, everyone that used to work with me at Walmart used to work with my mother too. So, after the obligatory “long time no see”, the first thing he says is, “I’m sorry about your mom.” I thanked him, quickly changed the subject, and put on a fake smile, but the damage had already been done. The knife stabbed my heart and the wave of pain flooded over me.

The rest of the day was spent just trying not to break down, which was a challenge considering the crap I’m having to deal with at work right now.

Now, I don’t blame the guy. I know he meant well. He certainly wasn’t trying to make me feel that way. But, unfortunately, he did.

I never really thought a few well intentioned words could hurt so much.

Flying Butts

It is incredibly windy in my area this morning. The wind was strong enough to move my car around a little as I drove to work. As I was walking up to the front door, the wind blew over the ash tray that is set up right beside it. Thankfully, I was on lower steps so the ashes blew up over my head, but I was still pelted by a handful of cigarettes.

So, basically, my morning consisted of being hit by flying butts. How was yours?