Wanna Participate?

A while back, I did a post asking for others to help me debate who fiction’s greatest archer was. I asked that anyone who wanted to participate should write a post and link up to my original post. Only two people besides me did it. In retrospect, I realized that what I asked was probably too much work for most people to do. After all, we’re all busy people.

So when Matticus and I started talking about a new Versus matchup, I got the idea to try this idea out again, only this time I won’t be asking you to do an entire post on it.

The topic of this particular Versus episode is: Fiction’s Greatest Assassin.

If you would like to participate, all you need to do is comment your choice and give at least 2 or 3 sentences on why you think your choice is Fiction’s Greatest Assassin. You can go over that if you choose, but 2 or 3 sentences is the goal. Obviously, some of you out there may have the same answer, so whoever comments first will get their name in the future post. I will be waiting until everyone else picks theirs before I choose mine. That way I don’t get first pick by virtue of being able to choose right after I post this.

In a week, I will be taking all of the comments and putting them into that post, along with a poll on the bottom of the page. I will leave that poll up for two weeks and we’ll let the WordPress community decide who they agree with.

Unfortunately, there is no prize for winning, but hopefully you all think this is as fun of an idea as I do.

So, please, take the time to comment on who you think Fiction’s Greatest Assassin is. Also, if you have any questions, let me know.

In Real Life

Our tech room has a chamber in it that has two entrances. One goes through the tech room. The other comes out into my warehouse. Somehow, both of these doors got locked.

My team lead, who got the information from a temp, asked me to double check the door and see if it was indeed locked on my side. I checked and informed him that it was. His response was, “The maintenance guy is the only one with a key and he went home for the day. We really need to get in the room. See if you can pick the lock.”

If I were in a Final Fantasy game, my response would have been “…..”

I realize that in the fantasy worlds I sometimes inhabit I’m a thief/rogue. It would be an easy thing for me to pick a lock there. In the real world, however, not so much. I haven’t used my experience points to upgrade that particular skill here on Earth. It’s not very useful in my life as a warehouse worker/writer/father/husband. 

I didn’t have the slightest clue where to begin, but I told him I’d try. The only tools that I had available to me were a box cutter and a pair of scissors. Now, maybe someone with an aptitude for picking locks could do something with those two things, but all I was really doing was scratching the metal of the door knob.

Of course, about a minute after I started trying to open the door, the maintenance man, who had not gone home, walks in and demands to know what I’m doing. Apparently “failing miserably” was not the answer he wanted to hear. 

So, I had to stand there and be admonished for doing something that I was told to do by my team lead. 

“…..”

My Wedding Reception

In honor of my older brother’s birthday, I’m reblogging this story about him. This story still gets brought up whenever the two of them are together.

33 Grams of Blog

I promised Twindaddy that I wouldn’t post any stories about him doing embarrassing things. After reading this, you may think I’m breaking that promise, but I have two reasons that I believe I’m not. One, he didn’t do the embarrassing thing, it was done to him. And, two, it happened at my wedding reception, so that gives me permission to use it.

Anybody that knows me knows that I don’t drink. Alcohol does not mix well with my medication. Since this was my wedding, however, I decided to make an exception. Plus, while my medication really didn’t give me any side effects, except to occasionally make me drowsy, I didn’t want to chance it clouding up any part of what is now tied for the best day of my life (the other being the day that Baby E was born).

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I Don’t Get It

A girl that works with me took a half day off for a doctor appointment.

There’s nothing wrong with that. People get sick. People have to go to the doctor. It happens. It’s normally something I don’t give much thought to.

It’s not that the girl took half a day off to go to the doctor that’s making me say that I don’t get it. It’s how she took the half day off that’s confusing me. 

She works from 8-4:30. Because the other company in the building goes to lunch at noon, our employees take theirs at 12:30 to avoid overcrowding the breakroom. She came in at noon and then took a half hour lunch with everyone else at 12:30.

WTF, mate? 

Why do it that way? Not only would it make more sense to come in at 12:30 and work her 4 hours straight through, it also would’ve meant a half hour not spent at work for no reason. I can think of plenty of things much better to do with 30 minutes than sit with coworkers when I don’t have to. 

WTF, mate? 

Why Ashton Kutcher needs to follow me around….

In honor of my 7 year WordPress anniversary, I’m reblogging this post. This is the first post I ever published.

33 Grams of Blog

I’m at the computer at work, looking up a TV series I like (Castle), to see when the second season comes out on DVD. One of my co-workers walks up and he says, “That show sucks.”

“I thought you said you’ve never watched it,” I reply.

“I mock things that I’ve never seen,” he tells me.

I pause for a second, then hit him with, “I guess that means you make fun of your penis.”

He’s momentarily speechless, then mumbles, “That was a good one.”

Meanwhile, I’m looking around for someone to pop up and yell, “BURN!”

I guess I have to do everything myself…..

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My WordPress Anniversary

I checked my notifications today and I got one that said it was my WordPress anniversary today. Seven years ago today I started this here blog. It honestly doesn’t feel like it’s been that long.

According to my site, I’ve published 707 posts during that seven years. That’s barely over a hundred posts a year. There are probably some bloggers out there that hit 700 posts in less than half that time. Hell, maybe the majority of other bloggers put up that many posts that quickly. I’m kind of on the outside as far as what the people around these parts do.

My 700 posts have been a mix of things. I’ve told you all stories. Sometimes they’re fiction. Sometimes they aren’t. I’ve told you about my beautiful daughter, Baby E, who just finished her last day of preschool on Thursday. The school celebrated it by having a picnic for everyone at the local park. She got to run around with her classmates one last time before going to kindergarten next year. It rained for two hours that day….the two hours we were down at the park. She was muddy and soaked by the time we got home.

I’ve told you Left 4 Dead, Star Wars, Spider-Man, and Superman stories.

I’ve told you stories about my own characters: Captain Procrastination, DICO, and other various tales such as Dead Set.

Lately though, I’ve been doing most of my writing offline. There are two books that I’ve been working on that are close to being done, but there’s still no set time on releasing them (As soon as I have something definitive for you, I’ll definitely post it). Those two projects are collaborations with other authors. The one I’m working on now is just me and I’ve found that working on a project alone means that I don’t write as fast as I do with others. Taking on projects with other writers forces me to focus more because I don’t want to let them down or make them wait on me.

Another reason I’m writing more offline is because I’ve been having trouble lately thinking of things to write about on this here blog. I used to have ideas pop into my head all the time. Now they’re few and far between. Maybe it’ll start coming back to me soon. Or maybe I’ll have to do another prompt post. I guess we’ll have to wait to see what the future holds.

To end this post, I’d just like to say thank you to anyone who has ever taken the time to read the words coming out of my fingers. There are a lot of blogs out there, many of which have much better writers than I, that you could spend your time on. The fact that you chose to spend yours with me is truly humbling. I’m grateful for every one of you. I wish you all a wonderful night