RTotD: 3/2

It’s that time again, everyone. It’s time for you to take a brief step into my brain. I promise to try and make it as painless as possible, but I guarantee nothing. If you start to experience any side effects, please consult your doctor immediately. We here at Stuphblog take no responsibility for it if you do. After all, it’s not our fault you’re intolerant of the 33 grams of awesome I bring…..or something.

  1. Political bumper stickers are about the most useless things ever. They don’t change anyone’s mind or make people want to vote. The only thing they do is make the car owner look stupid. Even if your side wins, after the election is over you’re stuck with an idiotic sticker on your car for the rest of its life.
  2. When did everyone become so obsessed with getting organized? All anyone is talking about anymore is totes. They’re only like $5 at the store. Just buy some and shut up about them already. And who the hell is Totes McGotes? Is he Rubbermaid’s new mascot or something?
  3. While on the local news website the other day, I saw this headline: Horse shot dead in Mason County. I have three things to say about that: One, I hope the person who did this gets kicked in the head repeatedly by the next horse that they are near. Two, why is this news? And three, why was this number six on their top ten list of most popular stories?
  4. Weren’t Flo’s 15 minutes of fame over with 15 minutes ago? What’s it going to take to get rid of this bitch finally?
  5. I like the way that children’s networks are set up. They play the entire episode, then play all of their commercials in between them. If only all TV networks worked this way.
  6. Before any of you go trying to explain number 2 to me, I know what totes means. I was just being a smartass. If you try to be a smartass and explain it to me anyways, I’ll find out where you live and put a political bumper sticker on your car. If you don’t have a car, I’ll put it on your forehead instead.

There you have it folks. The randomness that’s in my head is now spreading throughout the blogosphere. Unfortunately, there is no known cure yet.


22 comments on “RTotD: 3/2

  1. El Guapo says:

    On the other hand, Flo is a lot more tolerable than that damn gecko.

  2. 1jaded1 says:

    Bumper stickers suck in general. It is mildly amusing to see xxxx for pres in 2xxx.

  3. I hate Flo too. Especially since her name reminds me of a period. Second, I agree about the children’s network thing. It’s like they think everyone has a 2second attention span (which sadly is becoming more & more true.)

  4. Robin says:

    I like Flo; and I’m not afraid to admit it. When our grandson is here, we watch Sponge Bob on t.v. and Garfield on Netflix. I’d watch Sponge Bob with commercial interruptions 🙂 Annoyingly, the newer Garfield cartoons started giving healthy messages at the end. I hate that. It’s a cartoon. So what if he is a fat, lazy cat who likes lasagna?!!

  5. I would say, further, that ANY car with a bumper sticker is the sure sign that the driver didn’t get enough attention from his/her mommy when they were a child.

    It’s an old journalistic tradition: when there’s no news to report, find something that’s not news and make it news.

    Unfortunately, your mental instability is our pleasure reading.

  6. djmatticus says:

    Aren’t bumper stickers kind of like tattoos? An artistic expression of self?
    I’m not sure why anyone would want Gomer/Gilligan 2016 tattooed on their ass, but… who am I to say they shouldn’t?

  7. BrainRants says:

    I don’t do bumper stickers per se, but I do have “My Son is and Eagle Scout”on my rear Blazer window, alongside my “Wicked Pissah” Boston Motherfucking Red Sox sticker. Next up is an 11th Armored Cavalry Regiment sticker, because fuck yeah, Cav.

  8. This was a nice peek inside your mind… which could obviously use a little organization… have your tried a tote?

  9. benzeknees says:

    I was trying to figure out who “Flo” was until I read some comments! I DVR everything so I don’t have to watch the wretched commercials.

  10. I like the Jester’s idea of freeing the cars from branding.

    Although I quite like the idea of a bumper sticker I saw once which read along the lines of “if you can read this, you’re too close, and I can slam on my brakes and you’ll drive into the back of me and it’ll be your fault”

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