Guest Post: Why can’t they get this one right?

Please welcome Matticus to 33 Grams of Blog. As some of you know, I’ve visited Matticus over at The Matticus Kingdom on a couple of occasions and, in return, he has made me the First Knight over his realm. Well, today he’s paying me a visit. Matticus is a man of many faces. He’s the husband of the Queen, the father of the Prince, a great writer, and an awesome guy. He’s 33 grams of Jester. Once you read this, please go over and visit the Kingdom. Check out the rest of his awesomesauce.

Are they trying too hard? Is the story too dark? What is the real problem here?

I grew up reading Punisher Comics and while I’ve enjoyed watching the studios finally getting scripts and acting performances worthy of the “big name heroes” I’m still waiting for them to get my favorite character right.

It shouldn’t be difficult. You only need a couple major characters, a few explosions, and a whole lot of blanks. We don’t even need it to be an origin story so the script doesn’t have to waste time on the back-story. The mystery of who the vigilante is and why he is doing what he is doing would just add another dimension to the story. Plus, he doesn’t wear spandex so wardrobe would be fairly happy about that, I’d think. At the beginning of the movie there would be lots of bad guys, enter Frank Castle, shoot outs ensue, and then by the end of the movie there would be less bad guys.

It practically writes itself.

Then again, I guess I can see a few problems here and there. First, without the back-story you may not have a reason to root for The Punisher. Second, without adding in a love interest or some other side storyline within the larger plot it will be a hard sell to most audiences who don’t really want to watch 90 minutes of gun battles. And, third, he doesn’t wear spandex.

I know we just listed that as a bonus, but when children think of comic book movies they think of Superman, Spider-Man, Batman… They think of their heroes being ripped from the pages of the comics they’ve worn away to nothing and plastered across the big screen in all their bright colored glory, spandex and all. There is nothing bright about The Punisher.

He’s just guts and gore, hard nosed, and in your face. Break the law and you might see him in your rear view mirror and his face will be the last you see. It isn’t friendly. It isn’t pretty.

I get all that. But still… I don’t understand why they can’t get this one right. There are enough of us Punisher fans out there that we keep flocking to the theaters to see the slop they keep shilling out for us. We grumble and we complain but we go anyway. So, the base is there. The need. The desire. The want. It is there. We are there, waiting.

Perhaps one day Hollywood will reward our patience. Perhaps we will get a film worthy of the title War Journal.

I’m not holding my breath. I think it’s going to be a long wait.


22 comments on “Guest Post: Why can’t they get this one right?

  1. El Guapo says:

    Didn’t the studios already take two shots at The Punisher, each worse than the other?

  2. 1jaded1 says:

    Amen. It really should not be difficult to get this one right. And no love interest.

    • djmatticus says:

      While he does eventually have a love interest in the comics… that takes years and years to introduce, and it’s moe of a love of convenience, both after vengeance, both after punishment. Definitely should not be introduced in a movie version.

  3. djmatticus says:

    Reblogged this on thematticuskingdom and commented:

    I wax philosophical over on 33 Grams of Blog regarding comic book movies and one in particular they just can’t seem to do justice to. Go check it out!

  4. C.K. Hope says:

    Ironically enough, I read this while attired in my Punisher t-shirt.

    • djmatticus says:

      Seriously? I think that entitles you to a million matticus points for being uber cool like that. I don’t even have a Punisher t-shirt. I’m the worst fan ever. *hangs head in shame*

      • C.K. Hope says:

        Seriously? You seriously do not have a Punisher shirt? We have to get you a t-shirt. You’ve GOT to represent.

        • djmatticus says:

          I always wanted one… but then my parents wouldn’t get me one, and then I was too cheap to buy myself one, and then I entered the real world and could afford one but stop wearing t-shirts all that much, and then got married, and then the little prince came along, and then…
          Who am I kidding, right? Major fail.

  5. Twindaddy says:

    Hmmmm….waiting for Hollywood to do anything right seems like wasting time.

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