Smacking total strangers

I love my job. Everyone I meet there is so smart.

If you read the above statement and didn’t understand it, that’s because written words cannot convey sarcasm. I could have done the (/sarcasm) thing, but that’s pretty lame. Something else that is pretty lame is that I can’t smack people upside the head when they are acting like idiots around me without getting in trouble.

For example, while at work today I saw a guy who looked like he was between 25-30 years old. He was a normal looking guy, until he started “walking”. He was wearing a pair of those shoes that have the roller blades on the bottom. So he started skating up the aisles wearing a smile that said, “I’m a slow 5-year-old and I just found a new toy to play with.”

I watched in amazement, wondering how this guy had not been hit by a car yet. It took almost all of my will to stop myself from smacking him upside the head and shouting, “You’re an idiot! You’re wearing shoes designed for little kids and you’re acting like they’re the best thing ever. Go get laid or something.”

After watching that display of stupidity, I started wondering why we aren’t allowed to smack strangers when they’re doing idiotic things in public. Now that I’m home, and had some time to think about it, I’ve come to realize that if we did that, the stupid people would think it’s a game and just go around smacking people for no reason.

So, once again, stupid people ruin the world for everyone else. Way to go, stupid people. Keep up the bad work.

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